Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Defying diagnosis, Buchwald is back - The Boston Globe

Defying diagnosis, Buchwald is back - The Boston Globe

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An open letter to Dell Tech Support

You really want to know what you can do to make me reccomend Dell to my friends? Fine ..here it is.

1- I don't feel like I need to give you a pint of blood for you to agree that I own my computer.

Mine was purchased for me by a friend who owed me money that I no longer have a relationship with. Why? Well because he turned out to be a drug addled homicidle lunitic. In order to take ownership of the support case I had to recall his phone number which is deleted from everything I own since he was evil and scary, his address, He and I both now live in other countries ( Thank God) and now and I have no memory of his address ( call it up to selective memory erasure or post traumatic stress disorder) Why do I have to find my ex friend , get his social security number, blood type and a sperm sample for you to help me? It was sent to me, I registered it, I have the tag numbers and it's under your warranty. Own the case!

2- Also I got very lucky with my last support rep, I have often times ( And I don't mind outsourcing ) spoken to people who have clearly given me wrong advice, spoken with such a thick accent that I could not understand them and been spoken down too like a moron. Look I don't build computers but I have been using them since the eighty's, I do object oriented programming and I generally know my way around windows. If you get the picture that I understand what a C prompt is then I don't need a 3 hour explanation of what the freaking C prompt is. "Ok you know what the C prompt is, you’re there now? Good Type this. It’s the way you guys bunch everything on one disk that makes me confused about where I go to get the tools I need. If you get the vibe that I'm computer savvy then let’s get to work

3- Why can’t you just give me a bare bones OEM of windows and then another copy of all your add on’s and bloat ware. What if I don’t want the four gigs of tutorials and crap I don’t use and don’t want and don’t need? Let me decide what installs on my computer. I uninstalled your operating system and just installed Win XP alone. My System is literally over 30% faster and has gigs more space. Why? So I can have animated tutorials that take me hours to get rid of since they tie up DLL’s that I’m not sure about deleting cause there shared. I want two things. I want a Windows disk that will install windows, then I want another disk with all the crap you’re trying to push on me and then I want to be able to say “hey I would rather not install AOL but please throw Adobe on there for me”. So I can choose the crap I want and don’t

. Also don't give up so easy, again my last interaction was wonderful. I can't tell you how many times I have had one of your reps with one of my other purchases tell me " Sorry reformat, can't do anything" Only to find the answer on another board ( not yours) and realized that I almost lost years of data because someone isn't up to date with a Windows operating system repair tool that you installed yourself in my computer that fixes whatever the problem I have had is, or a Microsoft tool that is installed with the windows you gave me when I bought my system.

Don't you guys get a manual when you install a new version of windows? I do. Why did you give up on me so easily and why did I spend hours on the phone with you only to find the answer myself?

4- Lastly, make your components replaceable with other companies components I bought the XPS just for that and I still find there are thing's I can only get from you. If I buy a laptop from you and I'm somewhere in the Sahara desert (It happens) and I need a component and actually find one. Why shouldn’t it work?

After I bought this system from you it's mine, let me do what I want with it and use whatever components I want for it.

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